SG's Meditations #50 - On tough love, money, friends and more
Hello hello!
And just like that, we are on the 50th edition. Feels like a milestone. Feels like something that I must celebrate. This is not really a grand award on a grand stage but this definitely is worth celebrating. I have a hard time staying consistent and I have tried to not miss this for too many times in a row. I know I am far from perfect but these small steps need celebrating.
So, woo hoo!
Ok, now, back to work. Here we go...
📸 Photo of the week
Let's start with the photo of the week.
This one. Taken late evening outside the place where I live in Bangalore.
I thought the frame came out really nice. Just that I did not want that water puddle. And not have those cars on the far left. And then take a few more shots. But then I was in a rush and then I sort of moved on.
That's the thing.
I really want to be able to take nice cityscapes. And then edit those to make them even more good-looking. No, I dont have the patience to edit pics and I know that unless you edit them, the end product is not really gorgeous. Maybe once I retire. Funny that conversations have started to veer off towards retirement. My entire life went past by. Helping others build their lives while keeping myself on the sidelines. No, I am not sore about it (even though I sound like that), just that it's a realization that happened way too late in life. I mean I am 40 and I have nothing to show for it. Let's see if the next 40 make up for the time I lost!
On that note, I recently started this document to crowdsource things that I ought to do in my 40s. To be honest, the idea is neither new, nor original. I picked it up from a namesake's blog. This also reminds me of my bucket list. Here. And here. And here is a wishlist - most of these may never happen - but it's amazing to revisit these! #note2self - compile all these lists at one place.
🗣️ Quote of the week
See this image. Found this on some insta story of someone.
I loved it!
To a point that I put this on my WA status for the world to see. And react. This is just the right trigger that I need in life to work with!
Honestly, I am not for needless praise. And I am for discovering imperfections even in the best thing that you've ever cooked. This awareness of imperfections makes you work harder and plug any not-so-apparent holes and takes you closer to what your altar is.
The thing is, at work, I have always received tough love and I had to earn my respect by working hard and slogging my ass. At each place I worked at, the teams I worked with and the bosses I worked for have loved me like their own. But they made me work hard. They instilled the value of hardwork in me. They made me earn my stripes. And now I am at an age where I find it extremely difficult to change. So, I believe in tough love.
To be honest, tough love may not augur well for the mental health for kids of this day and age but I think it worked wonders for me. I am like that donkey that needs to be given both the stick and the carrot to move. But then I acknowledge that times have changed. And since a large part of my work is with younger people, I am aware of my responsibility. And am trying to find a balance between taareef and taane. Though I think I am not doing it well, I need to try harder - after all, I am responsible for the lives and careers of the young people around me!
PS: I am aware that by choosing to see content that I anyway believe in, I am merely reinforcing my biases. Any tips on how I can break out of it?
🔀 Random thing of the week
On the insistence of Vivek and Sonal, I have started to see Better Call Saul. This is after a long long while that I am binging onto something. I am being religious about not watching more than one episode per day (lol) and I do that while finishing chores.
PS: Mr. Garg, if you can find time to binge on a TV show, I am sure you can find time to write your book2 as well.
I am on Season 1, Episode 6 or something.
I know I have seen a few episodes in the past but this revisit is indeed amazing. Since I saw it long ago, am seeing it with fresh eyes. And since I know broadly about the characters (thanks to previous viewing and Breaking Bad), there is this familiarity. Exactly what you want when you want to hook someone into your narrative! I just need to be able to write stuff like this. And then hopefully make it for the screen as well :D
While the writing is top-notch and each thing is worth noting, one of the lines caught my fancy. It is when Saul says, "Upon this rock, I will build my church."
It resonated with me so much that I was stopped in my tracks, to a point that I had to take a screenshot and think hard about it. And funnily when I did that, I remembered these same lines had made me stop in my tracks all those years ago (in 2016) as well! Guess, some lines do stay with you forever! How do you craft such lines?
Sigh!
💭 Thought of the week
Two thoughts.
Both originated via my conversations on Twitter.
But I will talk about one here in the newsletter.
One is about what is Fuck-You money. The other is about (war-time and peace-time) friends.
Wait. Actually, it's the reverse. The one about friends was the first I wanted to talk about. But when I thought, I realised that most people will not agree (and not relate to that one and thus will not connect) and thus I will talk about the one easier to comprehend.
So that friend thread made someone I know on Twitter ask me a question about money and the answer to that was essentially my definition of Fuck You money.
So, for starters, what is Fuck You money?
In my view, it is the money that you need to have that allows you to say no to things for economic reasons. Yeah, like financial freedom. Just that Fuck You Money sounds sexier.
This number varies for different people, depending on their expectations from life and ability to think. For me, the answer was never this clear. It is (also articulated on Twitter)...
a house in India (mine and not my parent's)
a house in a country that I eventually move to (I want to live in another country for a few years, if not die in a different country)
an equivalent of 1 million US dollars in liquid assets (liquid as in cash)
about 10 million in immovable assets (apart from the houses and liquid cash)
access to 100 young people to teach me
While the last one is not really an economic metric but I think to keep me sane and keep saying FU to the world, I will need that!
Each thing has been picked with careful thought and intention. The idea is to not work for money but for the money to work for me. And the idea is to always have ideas and inputs from people better than me - the young ones.
What is your definition of Fuck-You money? How much is enough? Where would you stop?
🆕 The new new thing
The to-do list for my time in the 40s has to be the new thing for the week. Do contribute to it, if you can. Here is the link.
While I am yet to populate this, some things that I think I want to work on are...
Expand SoG network (and alumni) into a million young people. Right now, we are in lo two-digits.
Move to a different country and live there for a few years. This I want to do within the next 2 years.
Take C4E or one of our ideas to a point where our impact reaches a few million people. So far we are in the hundreds. I like how I talk about C4E as a collective already. #win
Get 6-pack abs.
Get to my FU Money. And from there on, become a billionaire. And then the richest man in the world.
Publish at least 3 books. Lol!
Make 1 feature film. This one looks most plausible.
Travel to 100 countries. So far I've done 40 odd.
Take a shot at the Everest. My deadline to do this is Jan 1, 2026. After I went to the base camp, I am on the fence about even trying. But let's see. And if not Everest, do a serious amateur hike every year. The experience is very very humbling and one must do treks often.
These are all I can think for the time being. And each of these is an "at least".
So yeah.
That!
Guess this is it for the week.
See you guys the next time.
Oh, I am in Goa and Mumbai next week. I may not have the time to meet a lot of people (for a change I am working) but I like the idea of not being in the same place for too long. Grateful to the world and universe for making this happen :)
Chalo, this is about it for this week, folks!
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Over and out! 👋
- SG / 07 Aug 2022 / Bangalore